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Wednesday, February 5, 2014

The Workout

Under daylight so weak it was absorbed by the dull street lights, Sonia watched Tommy’s school bus pull away. Making a point of not slinking off the bench and back to bed, she stood tall. Her nose burned from the cold, astringent air as she strode off to the park, to the five laps she would conquer today. She preferred to think of the laps as miles, notwithstanding the difficulty of suspending that particular disbelief. Rather than calculate the distance, she concentrated instead on the number of laps. Time being her only constraint, she had twenty minutes to break her record. If only the Parks Services guys would leave her alone.
Arnold Gregory puffed his cigar, pacing the dog so they could reach the gate just as Sonia passed through. The curve of the pond would offer him a perfect view of her butt when the show started. He knew the parks guys timed it, though he was unsure how they were able to manipulate the settings to make the sprinkler go off just as she was waddle-jogging past.
Like clockwork, the sweat-suited lady clomped by Denny and Kurt on her first turn around the pond, her face a scowl aimed at them. As she overtook the old man and his ugly dog, she coughed loudly. “Leave the old fuck his cigar already,” said Kurt under his breath. Denny rolled his eyes. They swept their way under the stand of pine trees in order to see the lady trundle by on her second lap. Kurt marvelled at her inability to remember it was the G5 sprinkler that misfired when it went on. Both men were watching as it sputtered to life the instant the sweat-suited lady reached it. They both saw how the plastic catch flew off and hit her in the eye, releasing behind it the spray that toppled her into the pond. Kurt gasped and sprang into action. Denny threw down the rake. “I’m gonna lose my fucking job,” he said.


333 words for , including MANIPULATE (transitive verb) 3: to change by artful or unfair means so as to serve one's purpose : to doctor

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31 comments:

  1. That was a detailed and entertaining jaunt through the park! Love your description, as always.

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    1. So happy to have entertained you : ) Thanks for the love, Renada!

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  2. Kymm, oh the power of your writing. I found myself wishing a fate worse than death upon Denny and Kurt. (A fate such as waking up one morning to find themselves both weighing around 1000 pounds and clad in sweatpants-and then having to parade around at say, the superbowl halftime show.) The real life Sonias of this world have more balls than the the real life Dennys and Kurts ever will;) Stellar work, once again my lovely friend!!

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    1. Haha Sorry to get you so worked up. Although I might go for them parading around in superbowl halftime attire...
      Thank you so much for your kind, enthusiastic support, Valerie. Tis mutual.

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  3. That story made me mad. I wished that those goggling (probably overweight) me got the misfire in their eyes! That's just like a man, instead of doing his job and fixing the sprinkler, he blames the girl. ....Yeah, I'm mad...that could only mean this was a good read. Wonderful job.

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    1. Didn't mean to make you mad, but if that's how you roll, it's fine with me! Yes, I guess there was a bit of the 'poor me' syndrome in there, and everyone having a go at Sonia. But she's kinda judgy,too...
      Thank you so much, Glynis!

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  4. Love this cast of characters - so well painted - if not their thoughts and actions. I hope Sonia manages to pull them both into the pond as they help her out.

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    1. Hahaha Well that''s where you come in, pulling them into the pond. lol
      So glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for the love, Sarah!

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  5. What a train wreck of humanity on all sides! This was so darkly funny that I felt guilty about laughing.

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    1. Ah, Jennifer! Exactly. A guilty laugh is the best kind of laugh for me to hear. Thank you!!

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  6. Loved the description, the characters and yes, as Glynis said, it made me a bit mad, too - but that is the power of your writing, Kymm!

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    1. I do hope the hate was outweighed by the love. Thank you so much, TIZ!

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  7. Hahahaha! Perfect! Thanks--I needed the laugh today.

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    1. Hell, girl, I love your laughter! Thank you, Tina!

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  8. Nothing like the added hurdle of some pervs to overcome!

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    1. Oh, no! That image of a hurdle... lol Thanks, Mel!

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  9. Oh poor Sonia!I feel kinda sorry for her-here she is trying to motivate herself to get some exercise and these jokers are only intent on "enjoying the show"!Man ,life sucks-what people do for kicks? :-(

    A fantastic piece Kymm-written so realistically that the characters got under my skin-so to speak ;-)

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    1. Haha. Sonia appreciates your sympathy. Thank you so much, Atreyee!

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  10. This is why I don't run - it's more dignified dropping barbells on one's head :-)

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    1. Yes, with any luck someone will take pity on you and bring you some ice!
      Thanks for the visit, Maria!

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  11. Such a vivid scene, the detail is great. I could see one of our seasonal snowbirds "waddle-jogging" around the local duck pond.

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  12. Not exactly what I was expecting!

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    1. Well, you're never expecting the Spanish Inquisition, are you?
      lol Thanks for the read, Catherine!

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    1. Yeah, they are. Thanks for the visit, Sonia!

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  14. Thanks for the giggle, as others have already said though, it is a bit of a guilty giggle... sort of. :)

    The characters are just so believable too, I do wonder what the outcome will be, will you be adding a second installment to see who gets the last laugh?

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    1. I do appreciate the giggle. I guess it was written to elicit a guilty giggle...
      I don't usually do installments, but who knows if one of them doesn't crop up again, in one form or another?
      Thank you so much, Steve!

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  15. I read this a couple days ago, but didn't have time to comment. It was such a vivid story that it has stayed with me. Good writing makes you "see" the events unfold. And I could see this poor lady and the trio of pervs very clearly. Lol! Denny and Kurt deserve to lose more than their jobs, and I hope Arnold's dog turns on him and bites him in the ass!

    Another fantastic job, Kymm. I always enjoy your words. :)

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    1. Feeling warm and tingly inside, my friend. I'm glad you came back to leave such a wonderful comment. I'm also glad that you enjoyed it : )
      Thank you so much, Ivy!

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  16. What a terrible set of guys... would love to see the sprinkler quench that guy's cigar instead.

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